There are countless times I said this to myself, especially when my Binge Eating Disorder (B.E.D) was at its peak in 2019. How many of you have done the same, a million times? How many of you have said that “this is the last time”, that you’ll start tomorrow, that you’ll start on Monday and then even plan and cram in your last binge with all the foods you desire. You know deep down it’s a lie and you’re lying to yourself. At my peak, I even videoed myself mid- binge, talking to myself with chocolate smeared all around my mouth, telling myself to stop. One day I might have the guts to share that footage on social media, but I realised every ‘last binge’ was always a penultimate one. If this sounds like you, then don’t just scroll down, just spend 2 minutes reading what I have to say. It may cause you to view your binges in a very different way.
WHY DO BINGES HAPPEN?
There are always reasons why people overeat or worse have B.E.D or Disordered Eating (D.E). It may be something stemming from childhood, your relationship, your job, your inactive lifestyle, your stress levels, or even a trauma. Binges could occur because your hormones are not working correctly, it could be that you’re massively undereating on protein and fibre, or because historically you at one point got down to a very low body fat. Anyone who claims that having regular binges is because you’re a greedy person that lacks discipline and motivation, is utter bullshit. Don’t get me wrong, some of you may have that sort of personality which makes it impossible, but what if you’re the type of person that demonstrates motivation, discipline, organisation and routine in other aspects of your life-whether that be your job or looking after your children? There are ALWAYS deeper issues relating to your behaviours.
Opening up to you now and I apologise if you’ve already heard this before but my B.E AND B.E.D on reflection although at its peak in 2019 did not just stem from competing in bodybuilding. The lack of control I had post show was because I got down to my lowest ever bodyfat and therefore my hormones were not working correctly (being stage lean is NOT sustainable or healthy). My binges lasted for months and even getting structure back with my food took a very long time. I would eat a 700 calorie meal and not feel full and at one point I honestly thought I needed to have therapy.
If we look at the Natasha pre-training, pre-show and competing, it was something I had long before (circa 2015 and even before) yet failed to address. Stress in my teaching career meant I underate a lot during most of the week and then at the weekends huge binges would ensue whereby I would demolish EVERYTHING. My diet was terrible anyway and because I was undernourished especially in protein, I was ALWAYS HUNGRY. Food became something I indulged in when I felt stressed, when I felt happy, when I was relaxed and so I was very emotionally reliant on food.
THINGS THAT WILL HELP - PEN AND PAPER AT THE READY!
Firstly, time is so important. It takes time to build new habits and time to educate yourself on WHY you need to hit a certain protein number and why you should have a diet high in fibre and WHY an eating structure is vital for success. If you are still struggling, these are a few things you might want to consider. So first of all, get a pen and paper, let’s do a little activity together….
1. Start off writing down what you roughly eat in a day with times. Are there any patterns with the times and types of foods that you’re eating? Are you eating more at night, if so what types of foods? Is your eating structure based mainly on snacks rather than meals? If you do have meals and/or snacks, are you having high protein with every meal? Is your diet rich in veg? If you’re writing down a lot of junk food, then there’s no surprise that you will still be hungry, given the lack of nutrients and protein in those.
2. Now write down a list of non-negotiables that you know are doable and you know are good for you. Here are mine: training x4 a week, hitting 10k steps daily, downing x2 glasses of water in the morning before breakfast and carrying a bottle with me wherever I go, always having a protein bar as a snack, always having x4 meals and always ensuring green veg in 2 of those meals. Remember, these are mine and every person is different so, you must write down things that are currently doable for YOU.
3. Now on your page draw 3 columns with the headings UNRESTRICTED, CONDITIONAL and NEVER
4. In the UNRESTRICTED column, write a list of things that you know you can have with NO RESTRICTIONS, things you can have unlimited amounts of that you KNOW are good for you. This is mine: water, sugar free drinks, veg, protein (skinless, lean meat), sugar free jelly
5. In the CONDITIONAL column, write a list of foods that you CAN control and not overindulge in, but ones ideally that you should not overeat on. In a nutshell, these are the types of food that you CAN control amounts of. This is mine: Cereal, bagels, protein bar, rice, potato, oat/almond milk, fruit, dark chocolate, peanut butter, yoghurt, Fibre 1 bars, protein shakes, mulled wine and any other alcohol
6. In the NEVER column, write a list of all your trigger foods. This list are the foods you currently CANNOT CONTROL amounts of. It might even be helpful to write a list of times next to them when you usually overindulge in these foods. Here is mine: biscuits, cake, pudding, milk/white chocolate, mince pies, spreads like Nutella and Biscoff
7. Now, underneath write a list of reasons WHY you want to stop overeating/binge eating. Here is mine: My dad nearly died and had 3 heart attacks, he himself suffered from B.E.D, everyone in my family is unhealthy-overweight, prediabetic, suffer mental health problems, have high blood pressure, on tablets. I want to feel good, I want my size 10s to fit me nicely, I want to live for as long as possible, I want to continue to set an example to my clients.
I’m hoping by doing this task, it has made you very conscious about what you do and why you do it. You may notice patterns of behaviour and notice the sorts of foods you are eating. If your diet is low in protein and fibre and you are over-snacking, this could be a reason for your binges. The whole point of this task is to become AWARE.
WHAT NEXT?
Now you are aware, the key is to start minimising binges. They won’t go away straight away but eventually if you keep going and learn a good eating structure, they might. Commit to your lists: GET RID OF EVERY ‘NEVER’ FOOD FROM YOUR CUPBOARD. Unfortunately to recover, it is a process of eliminating and NOT EATING the foods you know trigger you and for as long as you can. The fact of the matter is, you are not able to eat them in moderation, otherwise you’d be doing it by now. Commit to this like you would do a relationship or a marriage. Remember, you can keep updating this list that you’ve written as you go, as your habits change and improve.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I BINGE AGAIN?
Instead of crying, being upset, feeling guilty, adding another binge in the mix, instead analyse yourself: why did I binge? Was it because you forgot your lunch at home, was it because you accidentally skipped a meal and was ravenous, was it because your quality of food was poor, was it because you stupidly waited 6-8 hours before your next meal, was it because it was there at your friends’ house? Dismiss it happened and go again. It’s like being a toddler and learning to walk. You didn’t just give up when you learnt to walk did you? After all the falls, the grazes of the knee you didn’t say you were going to give up because you kept failing, did you? Keep with a good food structure with high protein and fibre and yes, eat carbs. The key is not to restrict yourself too much with B.E.D. If you start struggling with the CONDITIONALS food column, then move them to the NEVERS column.
Before a binge occurs, think about how you will feel the next day. You WILL feel worse. Instead when you want to overeat, try and be mindful of WHAT to overeat on. When you want a second plateful of dinner, go for another big portion of veg and maybe a little more protein. If you know binges happen at night-time, instead of going for the bars of chocolate and packet of biscuits, have a protein shake with a cereal instead, or a protein bar, or low fat Greek yoghurt with fruit and sweetener. Yes, it is ok to have another small snack and meal after dinner-this is the ONE thing that stops me from overeating at night. It’s all about making simple switches, not just about eating less if you’re a true binge-eater.
ONE LAST ONE
B.E.D is a recovery, like a drug addict or alcoholic, just because it’s food, it doesn’t make it any more acceptable. Don’t view this way of disciplining yourself as entrapment, it is actually freedom. Do you want food to rule your life, behaviours and emotions? No. Do you want food to rule and determine your health? No. One great quote to remember by Jim Rohn: “a life of discipline is better than a life of regret”.
Don’t try and do this by yourself, get a Coach you can keep accountable to, who will educate you on a proper food structure.
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